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The Sh!t No One Tells You: A Guide to Surviving Your Baby's First Year, by Dawn Dais
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There comes a time in every new mother’s life when she finds herself staring at her screaming, smelly “bundle of joy” and wishing someone had told her that her house would reek of vomit, or that she shouldn’t buy the cute onesies with a thousand impossible buttons, or that she might cry more than the baby.
Best-selling humor author Dawn Dais, mother to a one-year-old and author of The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers, is convinced that there is a reason for this lack of preparedness. She believes that a vast conspiracy exists to hide the horrific truth about parenting from doe-eyed expectant mothers who might otherwise abandon their babies in hospitals and run for it. In The Sh!t No One Tells You, Dais tells it like it is, revealing what it’s really like to be a new parent and providing helpful insights, humor, and hope for those who feel overwhelmed by the exhausting trials they’re suddenly facing. Eschewing the adorableness that oozes out of other parenting books, Dais offers real advice from real moms—along with hilarious anecdotes, clever tips, and the genuine encouragement every mom needs in order to survive the first year of parenthood.
- Sales Rank: #42103 in eBooks
- Published on: 2013-06-04
- Released on: 2013-06-04
- Format: Kindle eBook
Review
"An amusing and accurate examination of life with an infant." ---Kirkus
About the Author
Dawn Dais is the bestselling author of The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women and The Noncyclist's Guide to the Century. Her books have topped bestseller lists and have been featured by countless TV and print media sources. Dawn lives in Sacramento, California, with her family.
Meredith Mitchell is an actress who has performed in film, in television, and on stage. Her film work includes Mona Lisa Smile and The Reunion. She has recorded numerous audiobooks, and she earned her MFA in acting from Brandeis University.
Most helpful customer reviews
110 of 113 people found the following review helpful.
OMG Can I go back in time and give myself a copy of this book during pregnancy?
By Mary Lavers (in Canada)
This is the book I wish I had read when my daughter was first born. Except that I could barely keep my eyes open and I was still convinced that my precious free moments were best spent scrapbooking the precious memories of my baby's new life into an adorable hardcover book that I would proudly show off for an entire week and then never look at again. I was a sleep deprived idiot.
But had I been able to formulate cohesive thoughts during those first few months, let alone process complex sentences, I could have really benefited from this book, with such reassuring chapters as:
* "Breastfeeding is F'n Hard" (it really is);
* "No One is Loving This as Much as Their Facebook Posts Would Have You Believe" (soooo true...if you don't believe me, go back and look at your own Facebook posts from when your child was first born--if your child was born after 2007 of course--and notice the lack of posts that say "that little @#!$ woke me up every 30 minutes for no good reason and I'm starting to suspect it's some sort of personal infant vendetta");
* "Your Newborn is Not Cute" (screw this, mine was adorable! ...sort of);
* "Who Needs a Health Plan When You Have the Internet?" (the internet is hella dangerous to new parents--just ask the very nice nurses at my local emergency room when I brought in my five-week-old because when I took her temperature I thought it was half a degree higher than the other eight times I had taken it that day, and is it possible that she has malaria or scarlet fever or something?); and
* "It Does Not Go By 'Soooo Fast'" (especially those first three or four months...those are like the longest night that never ends...I mean awesome, but also awful...both)
It was just nice to know that I wasn't the only one who thought it was nutball bananas that everyone expected me to love having a living creature attached to my body and feeding from me for eighteen hours a day (give or take) while everyone screamed at me that I was doing it all wrong and I should really be better at this because it's "soooo natural." Okay, maybe that didn't happen, but that's what it felt like at the time. It got better. It all got better. But not until I relaxed and gave myself permission to admit that some of it sucked. I only wish this book had been written sooner!
P.S. For the record, I love my child (obviously) and I love being a mother (like, 99% of the time). But I also love that books like this make it easier to admit that you don't HAVE to love every single aspect of having a newborn because some of it is hard--CRAZY HARD--and that's okay. Loving your kid and being a good mom doesn't mean you have to love round-the-clock feedings and having someone else's poop all over your clothes. It means you hate all that stuff and you do it anyway. So thank-you, Dawn Dais!
Disclaimer: I received a digital galley of this book free from the publisher from NetGalley. I was not obliged to write a favourable review, or even any review at all. The opinions expressed are strictly my own.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
I personally didn't find it useful in my efforts to inform myself on respectfully caring ...
By Kevin Trepen
The "information" provided in this book shouldn't come as much of surprise to anyone with any prior experience with infants, and seems to be geared toward the mother who unexpectedly found herself expecting..or possibly someone with absolutely no prior knowledge. I personally didn't find it useful in my efforts to inform myself on respectfully caring for infants or myself, making a smooth transition into being both a mother and a wife, and life moving forward. This book is full of complaints and "forewarnings" about natural parental/developmental struggles that are common place in parenting.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Awful!
By Jessica Weaver
This book was awful. Not a single positive thing about having a child. She makes herself sound like an angry selfish lesbian, not that sexuality has anything to do with it. I get pregnancy and motherhood isnt all giggles and butterflies, but come on. Her sarcasm isn't funny. She literally states a few times how much she hates babies too. I feel bad for her kid. I recommend this book to couples where one partner doesn't want childen. This is what your partner will be like.
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